I catch myself focusing on how to be a wife and a homemaker before I've been called to that season of life by the Lord. I have released the desire to be a wife to the Lord, I know that in His good and perfect timing I'll meet the man who is my future husband, though I still struggle occasionally with picking this burden back up.
God has been convicting my heart lately about being "busy at home" (Titus 2:5) right now, instead of dreaming about how I could take care of my future home. Mom is a self admitted "messy" so neat and tidy has never really been practiced or model in my home, and I'll admit to being lazy, there are many other distractions I fill my time with that are much more "fun" than cleaning the kitchen or organizing my room.
I've committed to cleaning the kitchen every night before bed (not an easy task when the kitchen is used by 5 people who habitually don't clean up after themselves) I allow myself one night off a week, based on the assumption that there will be one night almost every week that I'm out late and am too tired to clean when I get home.
I've given myself permission to leave the kitchen one night a week because one of the sins I struggle with most is trying to be perfect. When I consider something a failure, I get frustrated with myself, I stop trying and quit all together. Instead of admitting and embracing my human weakness and imperfections and asking the Lord for His strength and guidance. It's a character flaw that I am daily working with the Lord to over come, I hope to one day be able to take everything as it comes and embrace it as a part of God's design in my life. I know that even when things go "wrong" God will use that circumstance to strengthen my walk with Him and lead me further down the path he has for me.
Being busy at home during this season of my life will allow me to learn and develop skills that I do not currently have. I have to remind myself constantly to pick things up and put them in their place, instead of leaving it where it is. I'm committed to learning these skills while I am still at home, that I may serve my family and minister to them in this small way, so that when the day comes that I do leave my parent's I will already have the good homemakers habits of keeping a clean and orderly home sanctuary for my family. There will be may other overwhelming changes that I know I will need the Lord's guidance for, I pray that the Lord will help me to use my time wisely right now that I may have the skills to use my time wisely in the future.
to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. Titus 2:5
No comments:
Post a Comment